Paul Galea:
Hello, Kathryn Robinson from the old, old days of IGS. How are you?
Kathryn:
Hello. I’m great. How are you?
Paul Galea:
I’m well, thank you. Now, just a little bit of background. We had a nice chat at the pre 2001 reunion a couple of months ago (editors note: this interview took place at the end of 2023), and I thought, geez, you’ve led an interesting life. I want to interview you. So here we are. First of all, tell us who you are and when you left IGS and then what you’ve been doing since then.
Kathryn:
OK, so I left IGS in ‘93. That was my graduating year. I’m Kathryn Lowe but I was Kathryn Robertson back then. I became Kathryn Lowe at 23 years old with the boyfriend I had from when I was 19. So almost straight out of school, and we’re still married, so that’s an unusual thing sometimes these days for my generation. I went to university for two years and studied English and psychology, which I decided I hated, which ended up being quite ironic in the end, because I ended up being basically a psychologist for the child that I had and ended up having to study a lot of psychology later on. But in between that time, before I had the child, which was at 30 years old, I started my own business. I worked in market research. I did programming and statistics. Maths was my very worst subject at school so that was, again, pretty amusing. And then at 30, I had a little boy who, we found out by the time he was about two or three years old, had ADHD and anxiety disorder. And when he was seven, he was diagnosed with autism. So since then, I’ve been homeschooling him. And this is his last year. He’s technically in Year 12, I suppose, in the homeschooling world. So we’re nearly done with our homeschooling journey.
Paul Galea:
Wow. So just while we’re on that, tell us a little bit about that. Tell us, how you got your – what’s your son’s name?
Kathryn:
Corey.
Paul Galea:
So tell me. Tell us how Corey ended up being homeschooled.
Kathryn:
So he actually was in long day care when I used to work full time back then when he was born and by about the age of three, everyone started saying that what you’ve got here is a gifted child because he would come and ask questions about things like aerodynamics and desalination at three years old. So we kind of embarked on this journey of ‘Oh, wow. We have this genius child who will do all these things.’ And we got him into great schools and started working down that path. And then we started to realise that actually, despite his extreme intelligence, there were just some things that behaviourally didn’t add up to him being such a happy child. He became quite aggressive and violent and would do kind of strange things and not connect with peers and be only able to connect with adults and stuff like that. So we did all the testing, and we’re talking a long time ago now. Back then it wasn’t as known about autism and the spectrum and that sort of stuff so we ended up being quite on our own with working this kid out. I gave up my job in business when he was about four, realising that he’d need help transitioning to school and the fancy schools we got him into basically said, ‘Sorry, we can’t take him.’ So we went to public schools and he went to a couple of different, special needs schools who also didn’t really help. And one day, he was just kicking and screaming on the pavement outside school after having yet another incident where I was called in for meetings that never seemed to follow through or help or work and I just rang my husband and I said, ‘I’m not taking him back tomorrow. This is just no good for him or anyone around him. I’m going to homeschool him,’ and my husband said, ‘Are you allowed to do that? Is that legal? How do we do that?’ And I said, ‘I don’t care. I’m going to work it out.’ And that’s what we did.
Paul Galea:
So then you did that since then to now.
Kathryn:
Yeah, so it’s now been 11 years. I just got a Facebook memory come up the other day that said about when we first decided to homeschool. It’s been 11 years.
Paul Galea:
OK? And obviously given that Corey had these things going on in his life, that couldn’t have been that easy for you.
Kathryn:
No, it was very hard for the first sort of nine years until we really did a lot of research and fully changed our parenting methods and communication methods with him and really worked out how to help a child with high anxiety. The autism and the ADHD were kind of easy to get around and understand. It was the anxiety that was our biggest stumbling block on everything.
Paul Galea:
Yeah, OK. And that’s pretty symptomatic of a lot of young people in the world today. That level of anxiety, even just in the general population of young people, it’s massive.
Kathryn:
Yes.
Paul Galea:
Yes, very. It’s like the growth industry, which is a little bit sad. But anyway…
Kathryn:
Yeah, absolutely.
Paul Galea:
And how’s Corey going now?
Kathryn:
He’s really going great. I mean, he’s still not a completely easy child to parent but, you know, compared to a lot of other teenagers, I think he’s pretty fantastic. He won’t do studies in school the way everyone else expects. So that’s a tricky thing. Like he won’t write and he won’t do standard book work and things like that but he can do trigonometry in his head and random space things that we all don’t understand. So he may never go to university because he may not output the way they want, but he keeps his room clean. He cooks some food for himself. Occasionally, he empties dishwashers and cleans bathrooms when you ask him to. And he’s generally polite and kind and tricky when he says stuff that he doesn’t understand that neurotypical people will react to. But we’re getting through that. And he’s actually just a really good kid, you know?
Paul Galea:
Oh, can I give you the tip? I had three teenagers, and they did none of that clean room stuff. So….
Kathryn:
So I’m doing OK then.
Paul Galea:
I think you are! Particularly, the keeping the room tidy one! My goodness. OK, so that must have been very interesting. Your husband was still working and running a business or you were working?
Kathryn:
Yeah. He was working until he got made redundant when we had our second child. Our second child was about nine months old. So Corey was 10 years old then, when we had our second one. Took a long time to decide to have another one and he then started his own business. So things were sort of tricky for a while there financially. But his business took off and then that really allowed us to get lots of stuff done and get lots of therapy and the little one’s neurotypical but with mild ADHD and he thrives in a Montessori school, so ….
Paul Galea:
Well, that’s good. And, one of the things I do know about you because, actually, spoiler alert,1993, your last year at IGS was my first year at IGS, which then tells me that’s about a billion years ago. So the thing I do remember is that down the track you began the first sort of alumni association at IGS called FIGS. Do you want to tell us a little bit about that?
Kathryn:
Well, I mean, it was tricky because, someone approached me to do it and I said, ‘Yeah, sure, we’ll do it.’ But I think students are so fiercely independent and kind of off on their own journeys as soon as they leave school. Even though they’re connected with fond memories of the school, they kind of just go and disappear all around the world and do a whole bunch of stuff. So it was really difficult to get people engaged and coming back, and especially from the years that I was there. They were very small classes.
Paul Galea:
And no Facebook or email, right?
Kathryn:
Absolutely. There was none of that. We were trying to just get people contacted through other people. If you had one phone number or one connection we were trying to get a string going. And so it was quite difficult to get it going. But we did get one or two events happening, I think, and then it all, you know, sort of stalled a little bit for me because my life carried on with this kid and all that. So…
Paul Galea:
Yeah, well, can I tell you that I’m doing what you were doing all those years ago, and they’re exactly the same. They call them kids, but, yeah, they’re super hard to galvanise into action. But like you say, when I talk to them, they’ve all got very nice memories of their school days, and they’re all doing pretty good things out in the world. And, as you say, they’re all over the world. Now, the other thing I wanted to talk to you about is, apparently, you’re a rock star.
Kathryn:
Yes. Well, I have a band. I’m not sure about rock star. We do eighties, nineties rock mostly and current stuff. We do pubs and clubs around Sydney, so sometimes you have a place that you’re basically singing to the bar people. So, yeah, if that’s rock star, then sure.
Paul Galea:
Yeah. OK, so, what sort of songs would you sing?
Kathryn:
Oh, gosh. Yeah, we do some Nirvana, some Silverchair, Foo Fighters, Stone Temple Pilots, Concrete Blonde. Yeah. All that good stuff.
Paul Galea:
Are you allowed to say some of the places you play?
Kathryn:
Yeah, we’ve got a gig coming up on the 21st of October in Springwood at the Royal Hotel. So that’s always a fun one. We like doing that and we get called back there quite a bit. I think actually, the bar staff really enjoy us there because it’s really only about three drunks that they always have — the same three guys! And then the bar staff keep asking us to come back. So it’s a nice one. We’ve mostly done private parties around the northern beaches and that kind of stuff as well. And Hornsby — in that kind of area.
Paul Galea:
Oh, very cool. I think you’re my first rock star that I’ve spoken to. So, congratulations. So going on, going back to your school days, you talked about how small the classes were and things like that. And actually, I remember, in those early, early days, they were tiny classes. Do you want to tell us a little bit about some of your memories of IGS and the things that you liked about it and maybe didn’t like about it?
Kathryn:
Sure. I ended up at IGS in Year 9 because I had been at a quite prestigious, all girls school from kindergarten through to Year 8. And it just wasn’t me. And I was very bullied there. And so I found out through a friend who loved his school, Sascha Percuoco who said, ‘Come and see my school. It’s really cool.’ And as soon as I walked through the door, I was like, I need to go to this school. I loved it because of the focus on music and drama and languages and the people. The kids were just immediately so nice and accepting, and it didn’t matter what you wore or what you were like or what your parents did. Everyone was just someone to be friends with, you know, even people who you weren’t necessarily friends with. It was still polite and certainly not mean or anything like that. I loved the small classes because you got really good teacher interaction and our teachers were great. I was there when Eddie Jones was the PE teacher, so that was hugely amusing for me because I am not a sporty kid and never was, and he was always trying to get the girls to play touch football and play cricket and do stuff. And we often used to just sit in the middle of the field and go, ‘Oh, do we have to?’
Paul Galea:
Not an easy man to refuse either.
Kathryn:
Exactly. That’s right.
Paul Galea:
Good. And, you were there in the times at Surry Hills and you were at the Balmain campus as well, which were interesting times. Any special memories of those places?
Kathryn:
Yeah, at the Balmain campus, we just had Years 11 and 12 there. So that was kind of cool, because it was very few people on campus and so we all kind of knew each other. Mostly good memories there. Except for my final year in ‘93 when my best friend passed away, so that was one bad memory. But it was also kind of good, because all the teachers and all the students rallied around and were really supportive and kind. And, you know, boys back then were… I don’t know what they’re like now, young teenage boys, but back then they would pull your bra straps down and untuck your shirt and lift your skirt up and chase you around the halls, which is super annoying. And these days, they’d be told off for that. But they weren’t back then.
Paul Galea:
Yes. I remember Derya going off in that ambulance. That was a very traumatic time. And her memorial service was just gut wrenching.
Kathryn:
It was hard work. I have a purple butterfly tattoo for her. I got it in her memory.
Paul Galea:
That’s good. That’s a long time ago. Then, the last thing, which is a bit of a question without any notice. But, you’ve obviously made your way in the world, and you’ve had some difficult times and some not so difficult times. Have you got any advice to people, young people, or any people — any advice about how to face life and deal with leaving school and starting a new job or facing adversity, anything like that?
Kathryn:
I think I do. I think it’s important for people to realise that what you think you want to do, leaving school and the pressure of getting into university and those scores and all that sort of stuff-once you get out into the world and into life, it doesn’t matter. No one ever asks you again what your ATAR was or your HSC mark back then when I did it. And, like I said, I did uni for two years thinking, this is what I want to do and it wasn’t at all. I left and I don’t regret leaving and I don’t regret not getting a degree. You just need to follow what’s going to work for you and try and find a positive route that makes you happy, whatever you’re going to do. So despite the adversity and the difficulties my husband and I had with our kid and stuff, we always tried to find some time to talk about it, to come back together, and for me, my band was my escape. So just singing and getting out doing that is my little moment, and it’s what I take. And I think that’s really important for anyone to find that one thing that just gives them joy and that bit of time to themselves.
Paul Galea:
Excellent advice. It’s been a real pleasure speaking to you. And,I will be seeing you again, I’m sure at some future event because you’re very, very good at staying connected, which is what I love. Because you’ve been on the other side. So you know that it’s very nice when people respond to emails or messages, but I really appreciate it. And I really appreciate talking to you. Super interesting. And I think I should try and make a time to come and see your band. If you’re ever playing anywhere east of the Blue Mountains or south of the harbour. Maybe I’ll get along!
Kathryn:
Awesome. I’ll let you know. Thank you so much. See you later.
